I made a hat! And I’m damn proud of it!

Remember the dinosaur I made 2-3 days ago?


And the mountain view beanie?1424532_10153398083377846_6058707116550358973_n

And the tree I made on Wednesday while watching Geordie Shore?10454910_10153398179577846_7082829417294728874_n



IMG_20141128_074829 IMG_20141128_074837


Crochet post! (smut later, maybe)

I found a pattern for this easy flower and decided to give it a go. And it worked. So I made a bunch. And I made a butterfly because I could.

9752_10153384418287846_4217057971932602267_n  10429216_10153384590287846_960419823945038740_n10421509_10153385788742846_3672524947592366020_nI made a hat with the softest wool, it looks a bit wonky when you look at it but it looks fine when you put it on. Might make a flower to add on it. Like this three layer flower I found a pattern for…


My wife aka The Anxious Hooker started making something with different pinks but it didn’t turn out how she wanted so I picked it up from the discarded piles and made a hat. ^_^


I finished the bag but I’m not happy with the result.

10364153_10153395135737846_4695594354386930292_nMy 7yo son lost a tooth yesterday and I didn’t have a $2 coin from the Tooth Fairy so I explained to him that sometimes the Tooth Fairy gets really busy with other stuff and asks the parents to help. And I freestyled and made him a dinosaur.

1610827_10153396818292846_8094780139640890822_nAnd this afternoon I made a tree.

10454910_10153398179577846_7082829417294728874_nThe plan is to sew them onto this beanie I made last night (after I undo the single crochet and add some rows of double crochet to make it bigger). 1424532_10153398083377846_6058707116550358973_n

Maybe food can wait, after all…


Hello! I’ve been meaning to post this excerpt for a while but I kept putting it off. The names needed changing, I wondered whether I should post more of that scene, or a different scene from that story… Anyway, here it is.

It’s a story I started over 2 years ago (told you I was a slow writer!!!). It’s my longest story to date and it’s a long way from being finished (again, slow writer). But I love it.

Paige has had a crush on Jack for the longest time and when they met on a plane, they both felt a connection. Later in the airport she is reunited with her girlfriend, Carly, who decides that giving Jack Paige’s number is a good idea. Long story short, a few days later, Paige and Jack go out for a coffee (and cake, of course) and then end up at his house.

***I included the polyamory tag for this post because while this is early days for Paige and Jack, they are going to be together, just as much as Paige and Carly are together.***

The following excerpt takes place some time after they get back to Jack’s house and after some deliciously naughty naked shenanigans…

**Edited to add the link to the scene from the story that Paige mentions in the kitchen, you can find it right here on WordPress now that Bree Guildford has made the move from Blogger!**

Jack groaned when the first taste of Paige hit his tongue. He pushed his tongue into her hole before licking back up her slit and finding her clit, concentrating on that part of her anatomy; her cries indicating to him that he was doing something extremely right.

He quickly found that licking in circles earned him the strongest reaction and when she started moaning even louder he glanced up to find that she was playing with her nipples, her hips bucking against his face something fierce.

He’d never been with a woman who took matters into her own hands (literally!) and found it extremely arousing. From her reaction to his tongue, he knew it was doing awesome things to her so he figured she needed the nipple stimulation as well.

Her cries changed and soon she was pushing down on his head with one hand and screaming into a pillow as her orgasm hit. The scream seemed to go on and on and on. He took one last lick and looked up at her when she started laughing.

That was a first.

He moved up on the bed until he was lying next to her and wrapped an arm around her, bringing her close.

Paige tried to catch her breath. He’d really killed her with that last one and she was glad he was holding her, she needed physical contact after an orgasm.

I moved… sorry…” he said, very serious.

She giggled against his chest then looked up at him.

I noticed…” she replied, a split second before he moved closer and kissed her. She melted into the kiss before a loud rumbly noise coming from her belly interrupted them.

She blushed, terribly embarrassed, when they broke the kiss. He smiled at her.

My thoughts exactly,” he joked before adding, “even if I just ate you…”

She feigned shock. “Are you saying I’m not enough, Mr Michaels?”

He shook his head and kissed her lips once more, briefly, before moving back a bit, smiling.

Oh, you’re just delicious, but I think we should have some real food.” His smile faded as he remembered her situation. “If you have time, of course… I know we said… umm… but I mean… I wouldn’t want to… you know… umm… keep you… from your girlfriend… I…”

He was rambling and hating himself for it. He never rambled. He got self-conscious and a little embarrassed when people asked private questions because he was a private person by nature and his private life was none of their business, but this, this was different.

Paige rested one arm over his chest, her chin on her hand, her eyes locked on him, smiling.My girlfriend is busy traumatising… I mean… entertaining some innocent young author person. Her last words to me were : ‘Have fun climbing that man like a tree!’ You really think she’s going to mind if you and I have something to eat? Besides, remember, not a one night stand.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “OK then, would you rather stay in or go out?”

Well… going out involves getting dressed, and to be honest I’m rather enjoying being naked with you.”

I’m enjoying that too. We could order in, then no need to cook, and no need to go out,” Jack suggested.

Hmmm and miss out on watching a sexy man cook for me? I don’t think so!” Paige replied without missing a beat.

Jack shook his head and laughed. “Right then… What shall I cook for you, madam?” His laughter died when he remembered he’d only just come back from a trip and hadn’t really bothered with a decent grocery shop. “Umm… before you answer that, let me just check exactly what food I do have.”

She rolled her eyes at him before getting off him so they could both get up.

He put his boxers back on and, remembering they’d left their tops in a pile in the lounge, moved over to his set of drawers to get a clean T-shirt out.

Umm…” he heard her voice right behind him as he pushed the drawer shut and turned round to find her right there, in her black panties with her arms crossed over her breasts.

“Could I borrow a shirt?” she asked sheepishly, biting her lip a little.

Sure,” he replied, handing her the one he’d just pulled out of the drawer and watching, mesmerised, as she put it on right in front of him. The shirt was tight on her and the way her nipples were pressing against the cotton made his mouth water.

He took her hand in his and led the way out of the room before he gave into his urge and took her back to bed. They entered the kitchen and he checked the fridge then the freezer.

Well… I have… bread… and bacon. That seems to be it,” he told her over his shoulder before moving to the pantry to look in there too, in the hope there was something left. He heard movement behind him and turned around.

She’d hopped onto the kitchen island and was sitting on the edge of the counter, her legs crossed at the ankles. Her hands were gripping the edge next on either side of her thighs and she was looking at him intently, biting her lip.

You ok?” he asked her, slowly walking over and stopping in front of her, his hands settling on the outside of her knees. She nodded then opened her legs. He stepped closer, his hands skimming up her thighs as he did so.

I’m fine,” she said finally, her hands leaving the countertop and finding his waist. “Just…” She shrugged. “Daydreaming, I guess. Bacon would be very good,” she finished, looking up at him while her fingers stroked his sides.

He smiled at her and leaned forward to give her a quick kiss on the lips before moving back, only to find that he couldn’t. Her legs were suddenly around his middle, holding him in place. He felt the heels of her feet dig into the back of his thighs as she pulled him closer.

His fingers dug into the flesh of her upper thighs and she let out a soft moan. He barely suppressed his moan when he felt her heat against him and his cock twitched. He knew she’d felt it when her nails dug into his sides and he groaned.

I thought you were hungry,” he reminded her, his voice a loud whisper full of need. He pressed into her and she moaned again, louder this time.

I am… really… I am… It’s just that…” she replied, her breaths coming fast.

Just that what?” he asked, pressing into her again, his fingers moving to cup her ass so he could pull her to him even more.

Well… remember… that book… I was tell-telling you about?” She was panting now and he was loving it.

The vampires? Yeah, what about it?” He was getting affected by the sexual charge in the room and was half-considering getting her naked again.

She’d started moving her hips against him, his hardening cock was sandwiched between them and he hoped he wouldn’t cum in his boxers like a teenager.

In the book… there’s a scene… the sexy lawyer… and that girl… in his kitchen…” She let out a loud whimper and he moved one hand to the back of her neck so he could pull her in for a kiss.

He ended the kiss a minute later and moved to her ear to whisper, “What happens in his kitchen?” before nibbling a path down her neck. She was panting and the feel of her hot breath on his skin was causing him to breathe faster as well.

He loved the way she was whimpering and moaning in his ear.

He’s… he’s cooking breakfast and then… he decides that… he’d rather… eat… her… on the bench… so he does…” she finished telling him with a moan as she moved her arms up and round his neck, pressing her whole upper body to his at the same time.

He growled, his fingers digging in her butt as she kept grinding against him, the movements of her hips gathering speed.

I can understand the appeal,” Jack whispered against her neck before moving his head to kiss her again, capturing her lips and wasting no time slipping his tongue in her waiting mouth. The talking stopped as they let their bodies do the talking for them.

They were both too far gone to think about removing their underwear but when he felt her nails rake down his sides a second after he’d deepened the kiss, and she let out a moan that had a direct effect on his cock, he knew he had to do something.

He broke the kiss and gave her a heated look. Paige shuddered when he looked at her with unbridled hunger in her eyes then unlocked her ankles just enough so she could reach between them and gently pulled his cock out of his boxers.

She felt his fingers graze her hot flesh as he moved her undies to the side and, guiding his cock with one hand, he sank into her to the hilt.

A dirty dirty mind…

I’ve always been a doodler. I remember filling up the sides of my folder when I was at school with shapes that fit together but did not touch.


A bit like that, though this one is rather recent…


In the past few years, when I’ve been in a meeting (I worked for a charity for a bit), I find myself filling the page before me with little flowers. It helps me focus on what is being said around me.


I was so bored in a community meeting one time I wrote down a tally of what everyone in the room was wearing…


More recently I’ve found myself drawing people. I’ll be sitting there chatting away with my wife and whoever and if there’s a pen nearby, I’ll find a piece of paper, the back of a shop receipt, the little paper coaster under my chai latte, a serviette, anything, and draw on it. It usually ends up being flowers or people and more often than not it’s people having sex.

I just can’t help it. I don’t pretend to be awesome at this drawing things; I hate drawing hands and feet, and faces are not a favourite either but every time I have a pen in my hand I seem to be drawing the curve of a breast and then adding to it. Sometimes it’s a woman in a fancy dress, sometimes it’s people having sex.


Sometimes I’ll add clothes and a background because we’re at a friend’s house and there are kids running around…


Some dresses I drew a couple of years ago


The thing is, though, naked people having sex don’t just happen when I’m doodling. No. That would be too easy… Every time I’m in the shower washing my hair, I’ll put the hair that falls from my head on the wall until I’m done, so it doesn’t clog the drain. Yes, I always get rid of it at the end, I’m not a savage! But every time I wash my hair and completely randomly stick fallen hair to the wall, it ALWAYS end up looking like people having sex. There was 3 hair people couples at it on the wall yesterday! It’s a curse of some kind, I’m sure!

Earlier this year Bree decided to start posting some of my drawings on her blog. Sexy Sunday Scribbles she called them. The posting of those has been a bit random but maybe that can be a resolution for next year!

I’ll leave you with one of my sexy scribbles from the back of a receipt.




I have a new addiction…

And the Anxious Hooker is to blame for it…

On 27th October, once the party for her newly turned 8yo daughter was over, she finally sat with me and taught me crochet.

I have always had this tendency to obsess about things I like and this is no different. I can’t stop. I’m constantly picking up a hook and some wool and making things…

She started me on double crochet first. And then I added a colour, then another. Then another.


First there was 1


Then 2

   Continue reading

Of the perils of creative meetings…

Bree & I had a couple of what we call ‘creative meetings’ yesterday, where we discuss her characters and plot development for the current story. We tend to cover a lot of grounds in those, and come up with different ideas we then decide to run with or not.
The problem is that it gets my brain thinking about said characters and plot ideas. And sometimes my brain just won’t let go.
This morning when I was driving our kids to school I got hit with an idea for Bree’s story (about a girl called Lanie who’s dating twin brother Blake and Logan, you can read what’s been posted here and here **WARNING** it’s NSFW, kinky and deliciously naughty) and the words came to me. I tried to ignore them but they kept pestering me so when I came home from my physio appointment (acupuncture! on my elbow!) I opened a document and started to write.
I wrote 529 words before we had to leave to meet a friend for lunch. I’m not done yet. It felt good to write again. I’ve been consumed with the need to finish editing my friend’s book in the past 2 weeks (and binge watching Castle until 2am most nights) and I’ve been putting my writey feeling on the back burner.
But today it came back and I’m glad I went with it. I haven’t had time to sit down and write more yet but I know I will, my brain is thinking up words…

So much naughtiness to write about…