Day off

Finished my first week at work.

Tuesday to Saturday, 9am to 5pm.

It’d been so long since I’d worked a full day, I’m exhausted. I know we’ll get used to the way things are now, but it will take some time.

I take Miss11 to school and my wife takes the other 3 to their primary school in the morning.

Yesterday we let the kids have a water fight outside, the weather was so nice, then they put up the Christmas tree before we went to the beach with my boss for fish and chips. A lot of fun was had by all.

Monday is the day we have with just us.

There isn’t a cloud in  the sky.

I wish my lower back didn’t hurt so bad!!


Working is hard!

Last Tuesday my wife and I walked past the sex shop that opened a couple of weeks ago and saw they were looking for a store manager/admin person.

I sent my CV in on Wednesday night and the next morning got a call to come in for an interview that afternoon.
I went to my interview at 4.30pm on Thursday, slightly freaking out and wearing a dress.

Me, a DRESS!

I don’t ever wear dresses but that morning in the shower, the universe told me to wear a dress. It was a bad idea, Richie McCaw retired from all rugby that day, and as much as I was not surprised by the announcement, I was not ready. I am not ready for him to not be playing but that is a whole other post that I may or may not write.

Also, my back started hurting like crazy that day (I spent most of Sunday lying on the floor on my back not moving because of labour-type pain in my lower back).

Anyway, about an hour into the interview I was offered the job, because, my new boss said, I have a certain earth mother quality and was grounding him.

I spent all weekend freaking out about the job thing, because it’d been so long and I have no idea what I’m doing and OMG YOU GUYS I HAVE A JOB!!!

To put it into perspective, the last time I had a paying job (as opposed to volunteer work which I did for a couple of years a couple of years ago) was 2003 and I was getting paid about $9 an hour after tax… My last day was Friday 31 October 2003; two weeks later we moved to France; I was 25 weeks pregnant with Miss nearly 12.

On Monday I had a day of unpaid training. Today was my first official day and it was ok.

I even sold stuff.

The shop made the front page of the local paper because some people are in a huff about the kind of shop it is.

Oh yeah.
I’m the store manager of our town’s only sex shop.


The Thing All Women Do That You Don’t Know About

Gretchen hits the nail on the head.

Drifting Through

image: Shutterstock image: Shutterstock

There’s this thing that happens whenever I speak about or write about women’s issues. Things like dress codes, rape culture and sexism. I get the comments: Aren’t there more important things to worry about? Is this really that big of a deal? Aren’t you being overly sensitive? Are you sure you’re being rational about this?

Every. Single. Time.

And every single time I get frustrated. Why don’t they get it?

I think I’ve figured out why.

They don’t know.

They don’t know about de-escalation. Minimizing. Quietly acquiescing.

Hell, even though women live it, we are not always aware of it. But we have all done it.

We have all learned, either by instinct or by trial and error, how to minimize a situation that makes us uncomfortable. How to avoid angering a man or endangering ourselves. We have all, on many occasions, ignored an offensive comment. We’ve all…

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Dreaded family dinner stress reliever

Life has been getting in the way lately, I haven’t been able to write much at all, only just getting my crochet mojo back, the words in my head don’t seem to make it on paper.

That said, I decided it was time to post about Ava and Jackson. ^_^

Sex is a known stress reliever.

So when you’re facing a whole evening with bitter family members who do not agree with your choice of partner, you’re hardly going to refuse your man’s suggestion for some pre-dinner stress relief of the naked kind…



Ava nearly threw her phone at the wall in frustration but stopped herself just in time. It was after all a rather expensive phone and she was extremely fond of it. Instead she took a deep breath then another, in an effort to calm herself.

She heard footsteps approaching and dropped her phone into her open handbag on the barstool next to her with a huge sigh before turning around. Continue reading

Monday Suckday **Rant warning**

Last week Miss11 went on a school camp with her class and another one. I picked her up when the bus got back on Friday around 4pm (broke the screen of my phone, but that’s another story, very boring).

On the way home she told me about how her ‘friends’ A and M were absolute little bitches, again. Pestering her to know why she looked sad and threatening to tell the teacher she was not liking camp if she didn’t tell them. She even asked me to talk to the teacher about it.

Last night after dinner I took my kids to their dad’s for the week. Once the usual chit chat was over, the father of my kids went back to the lounge while Miss11 and I had another hug.

Miss11 asked me to talk to him about the friends issue. I told her it was a whole conversation that I didn’t have time for right then (I need to go get dinner and get home to my anxious wife) but that I would talk to him about, at another time. She started bawling and I hugged her closer then when her father finally came down the hallway, asking what was wrong.

I told him the short version and he said, ‘Oh we’ve had that problem with M before, haven’t we?’

Well that was the first I head about that. I love how he shares important stuff with me. #onlynot

He told her to come into the lounge with him so they could talk about it and headed back down the hallway. I gave my baby girl another hug (or 10…) and reminded her that I’m only a text/call/whatsapp message away and that I’ve got her back, and I left.

I’m worried about her.

Last week in the car she told me that A and M keep taking pics of her in the morning before school and using them with that Face in the Hole app. And A told her ‘we know how to control you’. And that one time she was at A’s house (or M’s house) and feeling a bit glum, A (or M) asked her mum what was wrong with Miss11 and the mum replied ‘oh, she’s just trying to be cool.’


I know my daughter, she’s not trying to be cool in a bid to impress anyone, she’s just trying to be herself and it seems that her so-called friends make fun of her for it.

It took me back about 3 years ago when she went to a sleepover to her then BFF’s house and  said BFF and another girl made fun of her because she didn’t want to wear make up.

It’s hard enough to be an almost teenager who looks older than she is, because she got hit by the puberty stick, without having to deal with little judgemental bitches who think it’s cool to make fun of other people.

All I want to do is go to school and hug my baby girl and protect her from those girls who are not her friends.

Friends don’t make friends feel horrible about themselves. Friends don’t make fun of friends in a way that hurts their feelings.

It’s nearly the end of the school year, A and M are the two girls in her class she knew from her primary school. She has another friend, R, who was at the same primary school, but R is in a different class and they don’t see each other much during the week.

Miss11 has been almost friends with a couple of other girls in her class but it never blossomed into a proper friendship.

She used to be friends with E, who apparently, along with a group of girls, made fun of her at a party. Now, Miss11 wasn’t at that party, but M was. Now I’m wondering if it’s all made up.

Girls can be such little bitches…